I am learning many, many things on my “journey” to be a yoga teacher. When I finally decided to take the training, I told my sister first. It made sense because she was already a yoga teacher. She asked me, “Julie, why do you want to teach yoga instead of finishing up college?” And I did what any other regular human would do…
I lied. Well, sort of.
I stated that I had grown so much as a person through yoga, and that I wanted to help others do the same. (I just wanted this to be the truth.)
What I really should’ve said, is this:
School isn’t working out for me, and…I want to believe that yoga has helped me transform into a better person–I hear it can be done…maybe if I teach it, that would speed up the process? Plus, isn’t it SO AWESOME to be a teacher? It is very glamorous: people love you and look up to you!
Here is the truth now: I really do believe yoga can help to improve–kind of. I think whatever you put into the practice is what you’ll get out of it. I want to help people find that meaningful connection; to use the practice effectively for personal growth. Yoga hasn’t transformed me…in fact, I’ve only recently been able to use the practice for my own growth since I’ve started therapy. Through counseling, I’ve figured out what yogis mean when they say, “Turn your gaze inward, that’s where the answers are…not outside of us.”
I mean, when I would turn my gaze “inward” I really was in my own head…only I was judging and comparing myself to others or to what I thought I should be doing. And that pattern of thinking isn’t helping me out any…I was just doing what I ALWAYS did, but this time it was on my yoga mat inside a studio.
So, now that I’ve been gazing inward effectively, here is something I’ve discovered: I really do want to facilitate others find their OWN connection through yoga.
With this realization…a couple others follow naturally.
One, is the understanding that with wanting to help people find their own connection working at a studio severely limits the type of people I can reach. So, it is now less important for me to teach at a studio. I can reach a more diverse crowd of people through other means…like people who are too intimidated to enter the studio because it seems so serious and spiritual and they have no idea what they’re doing. (And rightfully so. I’m pretty sure I covered this aspect of a studio in my previous entry, “Namas-uck-my-dick-te.”)
Two, is that although teaching at a studio is less important, I still want to do it. Yes, I will jump through their hoops…(which sometimes seem never ending), only I will do it on my own time now. Stay tuned, because this part will make for a fascinatingly entertaining blog on its own…(as it is filled with DRAMA! EGO! REALLY BAD JOKES! and OTHER THINGS THAT MAKE YOU GO “GAASSSPP!”)
So, I hope to see you all around…especially when I’m teaching!
…or as the wonderful site stats on this blog. I can tell how many people a day read this stuff!
Thank you. And namasuckmydickte! (biiiiiiitch) I’m talking about the dog.